I'm not really sure how to start, except that this is the beginning of something that I hope will reach as many people as I can. I feel like my life has been filled with many trials and hardships, not to say that every person has the free will to choose their own paths and some of my choices definitely effected the amount of trials I have encountered. But through pain and suffering and hard times can always be found some sort of lesson. I have learned many lessons in life and feel like maybe something that I learned will guide others or just offer some sort of comfort. I don't have an MD, I don't have a great college education or proffesional training, just the advice I've been given and things I've observed and realized to rely on. The things that I hope to write about will simply be my own thoughts and perspective.
In short I would like to start with my background. I grew up in a small city in Colorado where I had great, loving parents. I have three brothers and one sister, who is my twin. First of all, let me say, being a twin has been a blessing and a trial all at the same time. My sister has become that person that I can always trust will love and understand me. But growing up as a twin it creates somewhat of an "identy crisis". It is a general thought that we are just the same. The reality is me and my sister are so similar and have a lot of "twin" traits is scary, but so opposite at times. It may have been hard growing up and there were times it was very difficult to discover who I truly was, compaired to what "we" were. Looking back I wouldn't wish it to be any other way. My twin is now my constant. My other half I can always turn to.
Life in Loveland, the city I grew up in, couldn't have been better as a child. As I look back I couldn't have wish for more from my parents and surroundings. When I finally grew up and moved away from my "comfort" I realized exactly how simple and easy things were for me growing up. I moved away from my parents at 19 to go figure out what I needed in life. Life grew tough and I didn't know how to react. After only a couple of years on my own I found myself so overwhelmed with issues that I hope most people never expierience the only thing my conscious mind knew to do was turn to an addiction. For me, that was an eating disorder. I lived this life far too long and found myself unable to take care of myself. My parents and I decided that rehab was the only option I had at that point. Was in an inpatient facilty for women with eating disorders for nearly 4 months. Which saved my life. Since then I have gone on not to be great and make only great decisions, but to further incounter more hardships and trials. I am still a young person at 27 and still making my own mistakes, but I would never change any of this as it has changed my entire perspective on how to deal with life.
I now live as a single mother raising my three year old daughter and although it is the most difficult thing I have ever done, I love every minute of it and wouldn't change it for the world! I only hope that every person out there who has been desperate for an answer that maybe I may be able to offer a shoulder of support. This blog is my story, my thoughts, my inspirations, and hopfully will help myself to continue to heal as well.
